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I work at home, so my kids are always underfoot. I never have the money to get out once in a while. Or to pay a baby sitter. I enjoy my work, but it's very time consuming, and because it can be tedious, I work around my kids' schedule. I'm always needing sleep, but never want to. I'd rather be playing with the kids or working. I'm always stressed out trying to meet deadlines that I impose on myself. (Can I whine just a little more?)
What I wouldn't give to start my life over and become a Vegas showgirl. OK, so I never wanted to be an actual showgirl, have no talent for being a showgirl, way too short to be a showgirl, and wouldn't give up my kids for a second. But it's a guilty pleasure daydream that creeps in every once in a while.
It’s the middle of Halloween season. No funds. No baby sitter. No talent. What can I do to fulfill this dream? Why pull out the campiest horror/comedy/Vegas movie I can think of. ELVIRA, MISTRESS OF THE DARK (1988).
This past Saturday night, a bunch of online friends and I popped this gem into the VCR and discussed it online. If you've never done this before, it's more fun than having a group of "real" friends over to watch a movie. You not only get all the popcorn and soda to yourself, you get to watch while wearing your tackiest sweats without fear of someone making fun of you. OH! And you get to control the remote.
Busting at the seams with morbid and monstrous misadventure (that was straight from the video box, I couldn't bring myself to write such a bad pun), you've got to love Cassandra Peterson's style in this movie.
As a B-Movie hostess, not much of a stretch for her, Elvira finds herself unemployed and in need of funds for her dream job… A Las Vegas show of her own. Luckily, her great aunt dies and she inherits a mansion in New England that she might be able to sell for the money.
After a hilarious, but short, road trip, she enters the small New England town and promptly alienates herself from the town’s pompous adult citizens. Fueled by her need to repair the mansion to sale, she quickly, and for obvious reasons, gains the trust of the town’s youth. She also tries to bring fun back into the extremely boring town. Both actions enrage the adult population even more.
There are subplots with an evil uncle, demons, and magic, which only Elvira could pull off in her campy way. One “character” that stole the movie for me was the dog that she also inherits. After Elvira gives him a trim… well, just think “punk poodle”, and you’ll understand.
Even with a PG-13 rating, this is clearly for an older audience… I lost count of the bosom jokes that came on the average of two a minute. But if you enjoy raunchy dialogue, goofy acting, and comedy, leave your sophisticated taste behind and you’ll thoroughly enjoy this movie.
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